You can’t hate a baby.
It’s just not fair. But what happens between a wee Windsor girl born …..and them growing into an arrogant Prince Andrew-esque monster that strides the globe offending every poor soul he encounters ?
Well, from the moment the kid emerges from the Magic Head Of State Producing Vagina…. the poor wee mite’s fate is sealed. Welcome to the Non Stop Golden Snobby Feudal Freakshow !
Immediately, the media tells us how brilliant this baby is. They tell us to bow down and be grateful. They tell us this baby is VERY IMPORTANT, and there’s rolling coverage despite the fact that 61% of people polled have said they are Not Interested. Mostly, it’s only loonies and feebles who are excited. When a frothing Kay Burley asked people outside the hospital for a reaction ( when George was born), one of them suggested he’d heard it was ‘a black boy’ ( ha ! Even The Magic Head Of State Producing Vagina’s not THAT magic ).
What’s overtly implied, is that royal babies are more important than Your Baby. Am I overstating it ? Maybe a bit – obviously the press and PR push the Awww….We Love The New Baby angle – but stop blubbing into your Nicholas Witchell Memorial Royal Hankie and examine the “logic” of monarchy.
No matter how hard your kids work, no matter how smart and clever they are, no matter how much talent and charm they have, your kids will never be as important as this girl. Your kids will not be considered to be head of state. Because our head of state is based solely on the rather obnoxious idea of Bloodlines. The pathetic idea is that the Windsor family are intrinsically superior. The queen – a keen snob- has even decreed Kate she must curtsy to other princesses when blando Will isn’t about.
No wonder Republic had the admirable Born Equal campaign. I mean, come on…over the decades the horse munching, repeatedly racist, snobby, nazi loving, tampon impersonating, tiger shooting Windsor clan have been consistently dysfunctional.
Once you accept the argument that they’re clearly not anything special, then the whole dumb facade that we should grovel to these florid cheeked lazy yahs falls apart.
So if this new baby is brought up in the Windsor tradition, it’ll be fawned over, given it’s every need, have nannies, servants, have its primary school teachers bowing down, be followed by bodyguards at every step, be pursued by bovine monarchists, become a target for terrorists, have his first girlfriend / boyfriend speculated about, be supplied with copies of Razzle by the butler, be denied a private life ( and if you’re going to insist on a bloodline monarchy then you can’t complain when people take an interest in who you’re firing into…). The thing is monarchy fucks you up. It’s not the kids fault. As I’ve argued before, the best bit of parenting that William Windsor and Kate Thingy could do is to move to a remote ranch in California and let the wee ones grow up ‘normal’.
Cue a posh dinner table in the Napa Valley in 2030… A 15 year old skategirl …looks at her baldy fat father… “So like…ummm….when we were royal the public just like…ummm…thought we were better than them…? That must So suck….”
13 thoughts on “royal baby 2: awwwww cute feudalism…..”
Not that William is an oil painting himself, but this baby girl is destined to look like…well, a Middleton woman.
I’ll leave it at that.
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And another for the tax payer to pay for
Nah girl won’t look like a Middleton woman, we can thank the surrogate for that. Who wants to see more arse flashing and claw plowing? When are they going to be sent packing is my question? The entire world knows Fake Kate produced 2 fake heirs, when is it going to stop? The paid press and sugars are lapping it up like cream and it is really just do-do
I agree, both of her “pregnancies” were VERY suspect. Something is definitely wrong here – they practically broke the sound barrier fleeing the hospital to go into hiding.
you guys. Too much.
Photos of George and that blank stare–totally not connecting with Bill. So Bill plays for the cameras and kisses the kid on the head “awww so sweet” HA what a joke. No microphones because of the last ‘we just met him’ screw up. Waity looked like she just came from the salon–not out of labor. I could not walk for 2 days after delivering a 9lb 14 oz boy and Cathy is prancing around in high heels. How long is the BRF going to allow this to go on? I have heard that even the Saudi Royal family are questioning Liz about this situation. When are they going to send the lot of them packing??
W + K did not want ANY media attention–just in and out wham bam–back to Dingy Dell. Let’s see how long K is out of the public eye before we hear rumors of a separation.
So when do you suppose the headlines will start screaming how Princess Cambridge increased tourism to the UK?
So sad to read so much jealously. Small-minded, mean and proud of it. Stalin would be proud of you all, if Communism was still in existence.
What’s even sadder is that you tried to play the jealousy card. Try again, and use a better argument next time.
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Fauxristocrat–by the looks of PC and Cam leaving the hospital all smiles and the Meddlesoms leaving in separate cars with pinched, sour faces, I think there has been a change–somehow or other; Like Charles gets lots more time with the girl and the Midds can have George. It will be interesting to see what happens~
TBH, they all can just go away and take whatever drama with them. Get rid of the silly titles and the ridiculous notion that some people are considered “better” than others by accident of birth. It doesn’t matter if it’s “tradition”. Slavery, persecution of religion,and oppression of women (among many other things) were once considered “tradition” yet no one throws a hissy fit and goes on an internet “you’re just jealous” tirade in order to bring that back. This is the 21st century, monarchy has no place in it. The people of the UK deserve better than to have the odious Windsors and all of its spawn foisted upon them.
And another sad thing is that highly educated people with many years of experience such as doctors, nurses, scientists, professors, designers, writers and architects will have to defer to these Windsor children before they even achieve anything themselves.
In addition to the embarrassing bowing and curtseying, they’ll be expected to give the verbal bow of referring to them as Prince and Princess. Some may see this as quaint. I see it as ridiculous and frankly embarrassing.